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Before I delve into Misunderstood, I want to give a brief progress report on self-employment. I laugh every time I say it. Like I’m saying, “Me and the Mrs.” or something so very unlike me that the words cause my head to swivel around to see who is speaking. But I like the sound of “self-employment”, more than I like, “unemployed.” I appreciated the bank rep with whom I worked. When I asked if my business credit card could be denied because I’m not employed, she said, “Oh, but you are. You’re self-employed!” She almost got a hug.

I’m getting closer to sharing my business concept publicly. I’m not trying to be mysterious. I share it with anyone I talk with. It’s just that publicly, like on the big Internet, is a whole other measure of sharing, and I want certain things to be in place, so when the flood of questions come in, I’m prepared.

Last week was a mix of many things. I was strategic about incorporating people into my day, which resolved the loneliness I was feeling by working at home without human connections. I went to an early morning bible study, rode my bike, and met a couple of friends for a walk. I also analyzed my LLC Operating Agreement and spoke with Legal Zoom tax and business attorneys. I opened a business bank account, worked on my business plan, and corresponded with an agent about commercial insurance, which I hope to finalize this week. I worked a really great one-day customer appreciation gig I got off of Craigslist. Within that, I learned (thanks to You Tube, again) to shuck oysters. When I agreed to do that in advance, I had no idea what shucking live oysters entailed. Live oysters come with other live things, like a little crab, barnacles and some other sort of wiggly thing. Ugh. But I powered through. I took a picture, but I’m not going to post it; I don’t even like looking at it.

MISUNDERSTOOD

I’ve decided that being misunderstood is responsible for many damaged relationships. I know a whole bunch of stories where people have shut down relationships because they weren’t able to communicate themselves well, someone didn’t communicate the whole story, a third party was neglectful in the way they told a story, or a person wasn’t even sure they knew how they felt, but how they were interpreted definitely was not the heart of what they intended. Maybe it was a missed text, a missed post, or two people were talking, but walking in opposite directions, and they just didn’t hear well. There are so many different scenarios that can lead to being misunderstood. If we were a forgiving people and naturally gave the benefit of the doubt to everyone, being misunderstood wouldn’t be a big deal. Unfortunately, we tend to be a cynical, critical bunch. Given that, we have to be mindful that we are human, and in our humanness, there is a high likelihood that we’ll be misunderstood, which is worth considering before we cut someone off, or add another brick to that wall we’re building.

When we react out of hurt or anger, our tendency is to layer bricks to what we believe is a wall of protection. In reality, it’s a wall of prevention: prevention from experiencing all the joy and happiness that awaits us. If we haven’t learned along the way how to contend with hurt, pain, and confusion, one hurt at a time, we pile them up. The wall gets to a point where it’s difficult to see beyond, or to remove any of the bricks, where pride is the binding mortar. 

I know I’ve been on the giving side of being misunderstood. I’ve miscommunicated, I’ve left someone out, or have been absorbed in my own life. Once I realized this, I could only hope to be forgiven, and I recognized the value in giving others a break.

I once hosted a party and forgot to include someone who is now one of my best friends. She was the wife of president of the youth football organization. I was inviting everyone. Everyone! But I forgot to include her in the email. Fortunately, she brought up the gathering. I was embarrassed and apologized profusely, but the explanation still fell short: I forgot her?! Very recently, I completely forgot another best friend’s birthday. In this case, I was grateful for Instagram, after I saw a post by her daughter. I was able to redeem myself because she’s that kind of friend. But what about the occasions where someone didn’t say something to me or I wasn’t reminded on social media, because I missed a post (which in my case is often). What happens when I’m just tired and don’t feel like giving an explanation to something, or extend an extra amount of effort toward someone? What if lounging in the sun and eating nachos is more appealing than answering the phone some days? That’s not likely, but what if?!

A misunderstanding can cause us to become slighted or offended, and even indignant. We can stack that wall, or we can step back and consider options that will make a way for us to see more clearly. As Christians we know that God is perfect love. God’s Spirit lives in us, and there is no fear in perfect love. Of what do we have to be afraid? What causes indignation? Fear of rejection, loss of status or reputation, questioning our worth and value? These are worthy considerations, yet as a Christian I seek not to be measured by the world’s judgement, but by God’s judgement of me. John 4:16-18 explains that perfect love casts out fear. When I trust in perfect love, my fears of loss and anger subside, and I can begin deconstructing walls… or maybe not building them to begin with. And I can be at peace with my fallibilities, and yours, too.

Whether it’s in a social, personal, or professional arena, addressing misunderstandings is worth the discomfort that accompanies making the effort towards clarity. At work one day I’d received a really negative reaction from a co-worker. I couldn’t imagine why she was so angry with me. I did my best to engage her so we could sort it out, but she would have nothing to do with it. I was grateful our supervisor called a meeting. She is so great about confronting hard issues and she has learned some skills that are pivotal in resolution. She began the meeting with all of us stating what we appreciate about the other. Beautiful! We all softened. Then my accusers (there was another who was in agreement with the first) stated their beef with me. Bam. A complete misunderstanding. I held back the tears and silently reminded myself that I was a professional. I was determined to avoid an emotional breakdown, yet there were obvious dead give aways on my face that signaled distress. When it was my turn to speak, I said, “I believe I’ve been misunderstood.” About the same time, my supervisor agreed and confessed a key piece of communication that she’d forgotten to provide to this portion of staff. Being unaware of this information, they were in the dark, and blamed me for something of which I wasn’t guilty. There were a couple of tears among all of us, but they were minimal, and happy. This could have gone a completely different direction had we not taken time for discovery.

Sometimes we don’t need discovery, but rather acceptance. Perhaps others are juggling things in their world, and we’re a ball that gets dropped. Maybe a friend is really good at looking like she’s got it all together, but in reality she has a child on her hip while she’s stirring gravy and helping her 2nd grader with math, wondering how she’s going to get her 8 year old to dance practice, and her husband is away on business. At this time in her life, it’s hard for her to wrap her head around her friend who needs her because she broke up with her boyfriend of 10 years. Maybe someone is struggling to keep themselves or their marriage together, and as a result they’re missing some cues from their children.  Sometimes, we need to look past a personality type that we don’t like. Even a personality type can be misunderstood. Scenarios like these happen ALL. THE. TIME.

I understand that not all rifts are a result of misunderstandings. But so many are! Our relationships are life giving and vital to our well being. This is one thousand times more true when this is your family. Paul says not to let the sun go down while we are still angry. Anger is real and at times justified. But if it’s fueling brokenness, especially in your family, you’ve let the sun go down on your anger, and it’s worth exploring a misunderstanding.

The biggest tragedy of all is this: Most of the walls we build are preventable. When we refuse to humble ourselves and to use our skills, of which most of us are capable, we rob not just ourselves of joy, but we rob everyone of joy. The wall builder and those who are on the other side of the wall are missing out. We miss the fullness of all God has to offer us now, in this life, experiencing the intimacies of one another today and the memories we will cherish once our loved ones are gone.

In other words: We miss you.

We are capable. We will reap huge rewards when we are courageous, confront awkward moments and sacrifice our pride. Let us be human. When Jesus was on the cross he said, “Forgive them Father; they know not what they do.” If only we could follow his humble and brave expression of love.

Forgive me, Father. For I also know not what I do.

Those words are usually reserved for romance, proud parent moments, or maybe a significant accomplishment in education or a career move. My happiness in this moment comes from none of those. It comes from something more ordinary, yet elusive up until now.  I am sitting on my back deck with a glass of red wine. The deck is clean and pretty, with lights strung from one side of the covered deck to the other. And, the rest of the yard is under control.

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I’m not happy because it was I who did it. Yes, I did do it. But I’d have been very happy for someone else to do it. I don’t feel the same satisfaction some people get because they accomplished a task.  I get satisfaction simply because the task is complete. Regardless of whether someone else has done it, or if I have done it, I own it. I own this house, this yard, my children (you know what I mean), these dogs, this life. It was important to me that the yard be functioning, and I wanted it completed.  It was an ongoing project since we’d moved in almost two years ago. It was like looking at an unmade bed each and every day, and I wanted it made!

As I mowed yesterday, I thought, “How long does it take a single woman without lawn mowing knowledge and who is ill equipped to mow a lawn?” The answer in this case would be, “About a month.” I’ll share with you some back story, but this post is mostly about the lawn mowing. It makes some sense as to why a big project like a yard overhaul might be difficult, for anyone. But I thought mowing the lawn would be easy icing on the cake, and when it wasn’t, I was reminded of how the most simplest of tasks aren’t simple if one doesn’t know what they’re doing. I need to remember this lesson when my kids confront me with a similar frustration regarding something I ask of them!

When I bought this house two years ago in August (I cannot believe it’s been that long), the back yard was a mess. The sellers had big dogs that they trained, and they had the run of the back yard. The front yard was decent, but the sprinkler system didn’t work, so it also began to deteriorate. I finally made a hard decision last November to pay for a landscape design and had it installed. I didn’t implement the new design in the front yard because the front yard was good enough. But I had the foundation of the back yard installed. It was flattened, sod was laid, and big concrete squares were positioned into a patio. I saved a lot of money by being responsible for planting the plants (I wish I could say that meant that the project was inexpensive, but it wasn’t). A couple of friends listened to me whine about it, and they helped me with some planting as well as some other yard work. When one is soley responsible for everything in one’s life, a friend who offers to plant a plant or do some trimming, is like an umbrella in a rainstorm. They are a relief and a refuge, and it hugely warms my heart.

The yard has been an ongoing project. It’s been through winter and spring rains (with some sunny relief), weekends and after work that I’ve soldiered through finalizing its completion. It’s consumed me as I raced to beat the seasonal time clock of the harsh summer sun. While others bemoaned the rain, I quietly praised God. When it didn’t rain, I spent an hour most nights watering plants in my desperate effort to save my investment.

So much attention was spent on the digging, moving dirt (clay and rocks), uprooting old shrubs, pruning, and watering, yet one other task was unavoidable; I had to mow the lawn. I procrastinated at this project because I was certain I’d whip it out in no time at all. I have three small patches of lawn. I had a reel mower that I’d not cared for well. In the moves from house to house it got ignored and sat outside. But I was certain that it was good enough for my small job. But I was wrong. It didn’t cut well. I decided to sell it and buy a new one. I assumed the poor cut was due to my lack of good care.

But of course, it wasn’t that simple. First, I tried to get the Fiskars reel mower sharpened. I called two places within 10 miles of my home and neither of them would sharpen a Fiskars reel mower. So, then I decided to sell it, and use the money toward another mower. I Craigslisted it, and fortunately sold it.

Buying a new mower wouldn’t be simple, though. Would I get gas, electric, battery operated or stick with my plan and go with the reel push mower. The latter was appealing on so many levels. No gas, no complications when pulling the start cord, and the biggest was this: I get to work out while mowing my yard (workouts have gotten very low on the priority list). I purchased the store’s recommendation and bought their reel mower.

It met all three objectives. I didn’t have to buy gas, there were no start complications, and I got a workout. Like, I really good upper body workout and not so good lower back workout. And, my grass looked like, crap. Ugh. I do hate that word. But there’s no way around it. The mower was eating it up the lawn. A goat would have given it a better finish. The mower missed large clumps of grass, no matter how many times I went over it.

The grass on the edges fell over, laying flat around the perimeter of the lawn. So, I purchased an edger. I had more decisions to make, but suffice it to say, the options for the edger were the same as for the lawn mower. I purchased an electric edger after work one day. I couldn’t wait to use it, but it sat in the garage for a couple of days like a piece of chocolate cake that had to wait until the big day to be eaten. The lawn taunted me each day I pulled out in the morning and pulled back in for the night, begging me to rid it of its scraggly perimeter, but my schedule wouldn’t allow for it. Since the plants were at risk, I had no choice but to place watering at a higher priority, and let the edge of my lawn hold out like a badly needed haircut until the stylist had an opening.

While the edge waited for attention, the weeds, grass, and blossoms popped up over night and every night. Edging was not the only thing that needed attention. I mowed the lawn first, hoping for improvement over the last attempt, with my brand new shiny reel mower. But there was no improvement! Crap. Crap. Crap. Between each “crap” I asked God to give me a break.  But I eeked out a wee bit of hope. It all rested in my new edger, in a hope that it would compensate for the sub par lawn cut. After assembly (another learning curve), I revved it up with hope beyond hope. But there would be no satisfaction on this night. I hadn’t anticipated yet another learning curve. I didn’t know how to use an edger.

You Tube here I come, again.

By the time I was done, green grass and wet mud spewed onto surfaces that weren’t intended for grass and mud. Bark dust was covered and grass stains smeared my cement squares that make up the patio. I love power wash, but I couldn’t imagine when I would find the time. My handling of the edger carved a new lawn design that looked more like a jig saw puzzle than anything else. I wanted to cry.

 

The amount of energy I was expending on my yard without success was depressing and I had an overwhelming sense of failure and loss of hope. My work days are full and I have a limited amount of time and money to spend on my home, and I’m tired of the constant effort that produces so little harvest.

I texted three or four friends who knew I’d been working on my yard and showed them some pictures and shared my frustration, to a severe degree. My filter was thin. They encouraged me, and offered help. As much as I like help, I knew that wasn’t the answer. Help would be never ending. My answer would be in new skills. I have to know how to whip out a mowed lawn, so I can still cook dinner or see a friend or pay bills in an evening. It seemed like such a simple task. I’d had the yard designed for easy maintenance, yet it was very hard (for me).

Yesterday my friend and her husband came over so he could show me what I might be doing wrong, and it made all the difference. He determined the brand new shiny reel mower was not cutting the grass (yea, I wasn’t all to blame) and he showed me how to use the edger. After some time, they left and I left too, headed straight to Orchard Supply to purchase a new lawn mower (I knew they were having a 20% off sale, plus they’re super nice and helpful there). As I pondered back and forth, feeling anxious about another wrong decision, a customer in the lawn mower aisle assured me that an electric lawn mower was a good decision. After 2 more stores (stock availability) I drove home with my new Craftsman electric lawn mower and determination to finish my lawn.

Again, a learning curve. I hadn’t considered the abuse by the heavy extension cord my plants would take, nor did I anticipate tripping my circuit breakers. After several trips to the garage I realized I need to turn off all the lights on that circuit when I mow and I need to move the mower forward and back, not in the traditional square or circle we’re used to with a gas mower. This will help with cord management. Oh, the things I’m learning.

Then, I decided to hang the deck lights that I’d purchased from Costco a year ago. Off to Orchard Supply for the fourth time in a day, to purchase eye bolts and quick links (new terms to me), per my instructions from Build.com on You Tube. After almost two hours I got them hung. The lights are heavy duty, so they’re weighty. I had a hard time on a ladder matching the hook part of the string to wood that would accept the eye bolt.

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All this detail for what seems like the most ordinary basic things. My friend and her husband were so gracious in ensuring that things were in good order before they left. While Blake was playing around with a sprinkler head, he proclaimed that he had broken it. I was a bit alarmed, but I trusted him to make it right. Within twenty minutes he’d muddied himself but it was fixed. That twenty minutes would have taken me hours, days, or weeks, dependent on my schedule, other peoples’ schedules, and their availability. I forgot to add that I had finally got the sprinkler system fixed, after many attempts to connect with sprinkler people. We never did meet in person. We communicated through emails.

“Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.” Chinese Proverb

Thank you Blake and Sally (OK, Sally was mostly here for support) for showing me what I needed to know, so I can mow my lawn, and cook dinner in the same night. And mostly, so I can enjoy my home. This makes me so happy. And maybe next week I’ll “get to” power wash.

Christmas Mug of the Day!

Christmas Mug of the Day!

The great thing about these mugs is that I recall many of them.  Who gave them to me, the time of my life, etc.

My blog of December 3rd ended with a hope that I’d be getting up at 5 (or 5:30) to work out.  Lest you think I’m a rockstar, let me come clean. I’m not. This week has been a bad week for early workouts. I’ve stayed up later than I want to, and unless I can get 7 hours of sleep, the lead on my eyes when that alarm goes off is heavier than any effort I can muster.

That morning I made it to our gym at 8:00, which I truly hate. It messes up my day. I see people with whom I enjoy talking and my 1 hour workout becomes a 2 hour workout, by the time I get myself home and productive, that is.  On this particular day, I faced even more distractions: The Holiday Showcase of local artists.  Ugh! Ugh, not because I hate it, but because I love it!  I found three items I decided I couldn’t live without.  Once I found them, I avoided other areas of the club so I wouldn’t be tempted to spend more money or time.

That experience reminded me of why I love to get my workout in early, when there are fewer friends, and those who are there in the wee hours are there because they feel the way I do: Get in, get out, and they’re not yet awake, so chatter is at a minimum.

However, just as I said in my December 3rd post, nothing is wasted.

I ran into a local mom with whom I’ve connected more in the last year.  She’s going through a divorce, and we’ve had a couple of brief heartfelt conversations.  This morning she made a comment that most likely meant nothing to her, but meant a lot to me.  She said that people like me, who have blazed the trail before her, have given her hope.  Blazed the Trail Before Her.  I worked hard to focus on her words from that point on, but my mind wondered about the hope I was giving, and the perception I’d created, at least in her mind.

I would never consider that I’ve blazed any trails.  In fact, the first year I was the trail, feeling like a long dirt road, on which I was trampled.  After five years, the trail has improved, but it’s been a long process. Three homes in five years does not emote a sense of victory or peace.  Yet, a different perspective would tell me that third home in the series is sign of success.  I recognize some things that have kept me moving, so slowly possibly, that to some it might seem like a transformation, kind of like that child that grows up over night, but we know that it was eighteen years of hard labor.

In my next blog I’m going to share with you some things that I believe got me to this point. Above all else, it’s been God. A father who walks with me daily, who loves me when I cry, scream, and want to give up.  A father who shows me the joy in the my loss, and helps me scale my mountains. 2nd Samuel 22: 33-37 says:

33 It is God who arms me with strength
    and keeps my way secure.
34 He makes my feet like the feet of a deer;
    he causes me to stand on the heights.
35 He trains my hands for battle;
    my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
36 You make your saving help my shield;
    your help has made me great.
37 You provide a broad path for my feet,
    so that my ankles do not give way.

I’ve deviated from my decorating. In time I hope my blog will have different categories that will allow for the lighthearted as well as a sincere effort to talk life. For now, one page shares it all, so enjoy a few glimpses of the lighthearted: Christmas Decorations!

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I get to go to a party tonight. More lighthearted. Dressing up. Yea!  I’m wearing a favorite dress I’ve had for twenty years that’s probably been worn less than five times.  Somehow it still fits. I’ve purchased a great looking pair of pumps to go with it.  I pray my feet tolerate them.  I hope your day finds you experiencing something that brings out the you, you were designed to be.  For me on this day, it’s enjoying the company of people in the atmosphere of twinkles, good food, and some bubbly.

Joni

It’s 11/14/14 and it’s been 14 days since I last posted. The number 14 has no significance to me, and there was no intention in not posting 14 days from the time I last posted. My lack of posts is my very challenging attempt to stay focused. I so want my home to be simplified so our life can be simplified. I want my garage to NOT look like this:

And this was progress since August 23rd when we moved in!

And this was progress since August 23rd when we moved in!  Note the blue Toile couch in the background.  Read on to hear about that.

Wouldn’t you agree that life would be simpler, minus a garage like that?? I am making progress. Tools are put away. I like the peg board I inherited. With a few dollars I purchased some of the tools that fit into the little holes and have things up off the floor and out of drawers, so those spaces can be used for other things.  This is the type of thing I might share on my friend’s Twitter, Jillgetsitdone, that I talk more about below.

Ahhh... Progress and Success!

Ahhh… Progress and Success! Done this last weekend. Ignore the pile of extension cords. That will come later.

Downsizing from a whole house of about 3500 SF (which, isn’t THAT big.) then to 2500 SF, then to 1900 SF has been a huge challenge for me. Progress on the garage translates to progress for the entire house. It’s furniture, home décor, yard supplies, tools, ski equipment, sports gear, etc… and placing them or removing them entirely. I am making progress. Knowing when to toss something, so you won’t have to buy it later on, or knowing a fair asking price of something all takes time and consideration.  I have had several items on Craigslist for a couple of months. This weekend I have three appointments that I hope will result in sales. You’re probably wondering why I don’t just give these things away. Trust me. I’ve tried! One item is a sleeper sofa that I absolutely love.  It’s the one that’s peeking out of the photo above.  But here it is in a much prettier environment.

Isn't it pretty! Who wouldn't want it??

Isn’t it pretty! Who wouldn’t want it??

I would keep it if our new family room were bigger or if Bradley didn’t love our leather sectional so much. He couldn’t bear for me to give up the sectional, so the blue and white Toile couch with black fringed pillows gets the shove. I started out at $300.00, thinking that all women would love it as much as I.  Not only do all women not love it, but no one loved it, for as little as $75.00! I couldn’t even give it away. All the organizations you would think to suggest wouldn’t take it because it’s a sleeper sofa. That’s the story of one piece of furniture. Trust me, the other stories are similar.  Hence, they take up precious space that I can’t wait to claim.

My other focus is finding a job, which is literally like re-inventing the wheel with each resume I submit. Because I battle the lack of a degree and 20 years of experience, my cover letters must be compelling as I put my best foot forward. I have finally taken LinkedIn seriously and updated my profile to one that reflects my employment history and employment aptitude. I also spend time meeting with people who might be able to help me. Networking is so key to making connections. I love the time I spend doing it, because I love the energy I get from other people. I have to believe that time with others is well spent.

The whole job thing is hard for me, though. On one hand I feel capable of many things, and get distracted with so many opportunities.  And yet I laugh, because while I look forward to so many opportunities, I’m not qualified on paper for so many of the jobs in which I’m interested! That has to be a hope I get only from God, because any sane person would think I’m crazy.  I am looking at one opportunity where I will need to write an article which I will submit in the hopes of landing a writing assignment position.  I may take some on line courses in Social Media. I’m putting in about 15 minutes a day of Spanish, but I think I need to get more serious about that in order to be able to speak the language. I’ve got a lot of words memorized, but formulating a sentence is a whole different story (or sentence!).  Do I sound scattered?

I’m doing these things while I pick up sub jobs for the district but also prepare a friend’s house to rent. They moved out of state and I offered my services, knowing they would be paying someone to do the work anyway. It’s been a lot of logistics for the last couple of months, but we’re getting closer to getting it on the rental market. I’ve enjoyed doing it. I like managing things and people.  I’m ready for this gig to be up though, so I can move on to the next one.  If you’d like to move into the Portland suburbs, I have a beautiful 5,000 SF home for you. Pets allowed!

I’m still looking forward to an upgrade on my site. I met with the gal I referred to on my 10/31/14 post.  I’m excited to see what she can do, but she’s got a “real” job as well as some side projects, so I have to wait my turn. Once my site is operating the way I want it to, I’ll be more enthusiastic to post on it, knowing that I won’t have to make apologies for it.

Bridgette is doing well at OSU, but I made a trip to visit her last Sunday to help her sort out the learning curve of being on her own. I left with both of us satisfied. Bradley is suiting up for the Varsity playoff games. He’s not gotten a chance to play, but he’s ready to go if they need him. Tonight is Playoff Game 2, against the #2 seed. We’re a good team, so we’ll see if we’re that good. My TO DO list is long every day. A good friend encourages people to be productive on her Twitter account.  We both love to be productive, so it’s fun to share our stories of progress, or not.  I love her Twitter feed. On her Twitter she encourages people who want to be productive to post their accomplishments, and while they’re doing that, we all can learn from each other. I was able to post, COMCAST: CANCELLED!  I have spent hours (like 15 or more, seriously) on Comcast issues.  I’m looking forward to using my time differently.  No longer will I hear, “Oh! We see that you’re an Xfinity valued customer” while I listen to the same hold music for long durations and get transferred from one department after the other, all without any resolution to my problems.

I will close for now. I’ve exceeded my allotment of time and have violated my effort to stay focused on my home. To my left are several boxes that need to be unloaded. Back to productivity, not that this isn’t productive… see, I’m scattered.

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Football is in full swing. Daily doubles in 90 plus degrees.  Bradley is loving it, and he’s also very tired.  His new number: 99. I like it!

Bridgette and me on graduation night.

I know this picture is ridiculous to post. But of course, my favorite picture of us is the blurriest picture of the bunch!  Bridgette isn’t going to the University of Portland, after all.  She’s going to OSU. I may post the history to that… the challenge of writing a blog is how intimate to get.  For now, I’ll say that the decision to go to U.P. was based on where Bridgette was in her life at the time we made the decision. Once things changed, she wanted to revert back to her original plan of going to OSU. I resisted that and hoped it would go away.  If you know Bridgette, things don’t go away.  I finally had to accept that the reasons I wasn’t in agreement about her moving to OSU were mostly related to how I felt, and not how she felt.  Once I gave her the green light, she applied and was admitted within the week.

We go to orientation on Monday, which has me a little stressed in relationship to the move.  However, if she were going to U.P., she’d have gone there yesterday, which would have been problematic considering we were moving yesterday.  I am slowly adjusting my frame of mind to OSU. I love OSU… but my emotions and energy had been given to U.P., so it’s taking me awhile to warm up to a new direction.

Here it is!

We got possession of our new home yesterday.  Moving is consuming… so why am I posting a blog? Because I’m a horrible mover and this is important to me and it’s what I enjoy.  We are very excited.  But I truly hate moving… too many times.  The kids are busy with things that are also important.  Bridgette’s finishing up her college Spanish course. Today is her last day; yippeee! But that has meant study study study.  Her back has gone out and she’s back to PT 3 to 4 times a week, sleeping on the floor, and lots of frustration about having to stop the progress she was making in running.  She has lots of friends leaving for college, so she’s wanted to see them a bit, as well.  It’s a balance to get the kids to help while respecting that they can’t carry the load.

But moving we are.  Friends are helping and for that I am grateful grateful grateful.  In fact… a friend has arrived. It’s a good thing. I might have written all day.

I also just got a phone call for an interview at a school, which I made for next Tuesday.

So… off I go to do what is wonderful, yet not my favorite thing to do.  My friend related it to birth a while back. We do the hard work to get the wonderful gift.  I’m so glad for the friends who are holding my hand through the labor.